You may call me a stern and demanding taskmaster, but because the last one was so much fun, it’s time for another pop quiz on men’s sexual health. This one is based on real-life, case-based questions.
1. In anticipation of a romantic encounter with his partner, and to help him be the best that he can be, a man takes Viagra. His next move should be:
A. Watch Law and Order, a stirring drama to stir the loins.
B. Go to the post office and renew his passport.
C. Eat tacos and drink beer.
D. Play strip poker with his romantic encounter.
Answer: D. Viagra and the other erection pills do not provide an instantaneous erection. They may take from 20-60 minutes to work. In addition, they won’t give you an erection unless you want it to occur. Engaging in stimulation and foreplay is an excellent way to spend your time waiting for the pill to kick in.
2. Good sex ALWAYS involves:
A. Multiple orgasms from your partner.
B. Whatever looks really freaky in the last pornographic film you saw.
C. Kinky stuff.
D. Leather of one sort or another
E. None of the above.
Answer: E. In our society, exceptions to any rule fascinate us. Here, extreme sex performance acts, characteristic of pornography, are the exception. Sex was designed by Mother Nature to be satisfying when undertaken in many different ways, and takes many different forms, all of which can be intimate and pleasurable without having to go to extremes.
3. The problem with porn on the Internet is that:
A. There is no problem! It’s good fun and free!
B. The video is fuzzy and far too pixilated.
C. I can’t watch it at work without getting caught.
D. I can get too used to it, and sex with my own partner could become unsatisfying.
Answer: D. With the increasing availability of porn, a serious problem is arising. Men who are without partners become accustomed to that kind of sexual stimulation and then end up needing that same kind of stimulation to become aroused with a partner. So, when they find themselves face to face with an honest-to-goodness, flesh-and-blood woman, they may have trouble performing. This is an increasingly common issue for sex therapists.
4. TRUE or FALSE: You and your partner have a night in together. You turn off the television, go upstairs, and tenderly give each other long, leisurely massages with body oil in a room lit only by candles. You have a great time. This constitutes a satisfying sexual experience.
Answer: True. “Sex” does not have to involve sexual intercourse and climax and orgasm. The point is to feel satisfaction and closeness with your partner. Of course sex can involve pure carnal pleasure, but that definition should be broadened to include other emotional and physical intimacy.
5. TRUE or FALSE: Since the advent of free love, we’ve become liberated from the sexual taboos of our mothers and fathers.
Answer: Profoundly False. Although we’d like to think so, sex therapists still see tales of embarrassment and lack of communication between couples, now more than ever. Being able to express our needs, both emotional and physical, without embarrassment or shame, is a problem of the ages.