Listen and Learn
This week, I refused to perform a vasectomy on a patient of mine. That is, until he saw a doctor about his sky-high blood pressure. Thirty years old and a father of three, he is a productive, hardworking member of society who just happened to never have seen a doctor as an adult. Unusual? Not at all.
Why does this happen? Is it because, in the words of Andy Rooney, that “death is a distant rumor to the young?” What is it about being young and male that instills this concept of immortality? For one thing, men do not have a monthly biological reminder of their health, similar to the female menstrual cycle. Second, the culture of men is imbibed with the “breadwinner” mentality that tends to equate illness with weakness. Lastly, men are terrible goaltenders of their own health. It is simply not on the radar of most men to think about their health unless something a) hurts, or b) is life threatening.
Lets delve into the last of these a bit as there is an interesting corollary to back this up. It is clear from many studies over the last century that married men uniformly outlive their single counterparts. In some studies, the difference in lifespan approached 10 years. Viewed another way, divorce affects a man’s health about the same as picking up a pack-a-day cigarette habit. So, it is clear that one of the best strategies to a longer life is to marry and stay married. If it is in your personality to gain immortality by this approach then so be it.
But that may not be the case of my patient, who in fact came back one week later for his vasectomy, feeling empowered, and with his blood pressure under perfect control. “And I thought the headaches that I had been getting were due to the stress I have been feeling.” He was a changed man, in control of his health for the first time in his life. He also understood the concept that life-threatening illnesses may be subtler than a broken bone.
After 17 years of caring for young men, it is clear to me that they are an incredibly underserved population. In fact, this is one the key points that I will make as an invited speaker to the Centers For Disease Control (CDC) upcoming summit on “Advancing Men’s Reproductive Health in the US” to be held in Atlanta next months. In my practice, I assume that men need help understanding how to take better care of themselves. I know that they would like to find out more about what health issues they may have inherited that can harm them, but they have trouble asking and knowing where to turn. Hence my practice motto: “The way to take great care of men is simple: just listen to them.” And listen quietly, as their voices are soft. Trust me, this hardly ever happens in the standard, 12-minute office visit that is currently de rigueur in this country.